my byf/dni

byf
• i am an autistic adult. this is not to excuse my behavior, only explain it. yes, i was officially diagnosed. twice. feel free to ask about how that happened.

• refer to me with they/them pronouns or not at all please. thanks.

• i live in the UK but hours can be weird. don't worry about it.

• sans is not my actual name.
^{i just don't identify with my legal name.}
^{i'd prefer you call me sans or aly, or some variation of my username.}

• if I've blocked you on another site and you recognise me, please leave me alone.
^{if you've blocked me on another site, and i interact with you, it is likely i just don't recognise you, as i actively attempt to avoid block evading. (to the point where if i do recognise someone on another site as someone who i've blocked or who has blocked me, i'll block them asap. not out of malice, but just to respect boundaries.)}

• don't know why you got blocked?
^{i very much doubt it, but primary reasons are due to stuff on the DNI, proven PSAs that I can verify for myself, i just don't like your vibe, or you don't feel like someone i can be safe around. sometimes this will also apply to their closest friends if they seem to be particularly close because i am worried i will be harassed by said friend if i block the other person. usually, it's the kind of friend who blindly defends someone without reading stuff. so if you know you don't breach the DNI and you 'seem okay', consider who you're interacting with ig.}

^{or it could, y'know, just be a personal thing i don't have to explain to you.}

^{does that seem hostile? it's not intended to be. i'm critically low on energy and done with everyone's shit, so i'm talking plainly. im rather too sick of catty people so i'm beating through the bush and going straight to the point, or however the saying goes. likewise some of my statements can seem 'hostile' if im not using a lot of emojis due to the punctuation, lack of capitals, etc. its like a resting bitch face but in text form.}

^{also i'm done with everyone's shit.}

• I'm autistic. I am not familiar with tone indicators, and they are not accessible to me. This doesn't mean they don't work for anyone, but I struggle with acronyms and language in general.
^{Please just spell out the words you're indicating (eg nm should be not mad) because I might confuse them otherwise. (EG confusing not mad for nevermind).}

• Obviously this doesn't apply to you if you don't use tone indicators, though I would like to know if you're being serious :p

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dni
do not interact

• racists
(also includes ALM/NACAB people and trump supporters, confederate flag wielders, etc.)

• neonazis / whatever tf they call themselves now
(see above)

• islamophobes
(i am not muslim, this just often goes hand in hand w/ racism and other shit.)

• antisemitic
(see above + ordering this list as i have does not mean i prioritise one of these things above the other.)

• overly religious people in general (all religions)
chill people are OK just don't hit any of the rest of the DNI
and don't try to convert me.

yes, this applies to overly edgy atheists as well, despite
the fact that i'm an atheist too. just don't be a dick.

• homophobes

• biphobes, panphobes, etc.
^{most people agree that bisexuality refers to feeling attracted to multiple genders (2 or more), while pansexuality is attraction regardless of gender (or rather just in general, rather than preferences to any specific gender). there are overlaps between the two, but they are distinct. both labels are 100% valid and neither of them are transphobic. TERFs went out of their way to cause this divide and spread misinformation in order to fuel this debate.}

• sexists
^{(includes transphobia/transphobes, exorsexism, transmisogynists}
^{as well as people against intersex people.)}

• anti-microlabels/neopronouns
^{(I don't use many microlabels, and i don't really use neopronouns, but this still stands as this usually outs people as transphobes real quick...)}

• TERFs/FARTs/SWERFs, Radfems, Truscum, gendercritical, etc.
^{(Anyone who subscribes to this sort of stuff. Also includes people who have these beliefs but pretend it doesn't make them part of these groups.)}

• Exclusionists
^{(towards aro, ace, bi, pan, nonbinary and/or trans people. also includes people who don't think mspec lesbians are lesbians, people who believe in "gold star lesbians" (aka terfs) and all of the superstraight bullshit.)}

• JK Rowling Stans.
^{(See... all of the above + ableism + homophobia + other stuff. She actively hates autistic and trans people. I am autistic and trans. And I am very, very sick of people prioritising a shit kiddy book over our lives.)}

• Ableists
^{(Includes below point + anyone considering themselves to be pro-aba or other abusive ""therapies"" to ""cure"" us. Fuck off.)}

• Pro-autism speaks (it's a hate group...) or NEXT for Autism. (Founded by Autism Speaks, same premises.)
^{Try to avoid charities and aim for supporting self advocacy networks instead. A lot of "charities" actually focus more on abusing and eradicating us rather than giving us the support we actually need.}

^{If you're looking to actually support autistic people instead of speaking over us, try ASAN (Autistic Self Advocacy Network), the National Autism Society or Autistic Women and Nonbinary Network (AWN) instead.}

^{You can find more options as well as explanations here.}

• specific stalkers
^{(especially the gaslighting/slandering satanist kron one from dA, if they go back to stalking - feel free to PM about this one. as of jan 2022 they've apologised and things've gone quiet, but i'm dubious, as they've done this before.)}

^{this will be removed/edited if it ends up being a long time thing, but right now i can't trust it.}

• anti self dx (aka anti-self-advocacy
^{(i am, for the record, officially diagnosed and everything for what i am diagnosed for - i’m still pro self-diagnosis & self-advocacy. see THDstatement if you're here about the DID thing. i do not have DID and I do not claim to have it. That was untrue and unkind.)}

• anti-vaxxers
^{(in general + covid deniers. you could make me horribly sick. please do not.)}

• anti-choice
^{(re: accessing safe abortion, birth control, etc. see: sexists)}

• pedophiles, MAPs, NOPs, pears
^{i don't care what the hell you call yourself, if you're attracted to underaged people in any of those weird ways just fuck off!!! don't interact with me. ever.}
^{(personal stuff.)}

^{if you have a character fitting this description this will only apply to you if you glamorise/support or otherwise condone their behavior. if you have a pedophile that literally gets eaten alive by sharks because they're gross then yknow.}

• a ddlg / cgl(re) / etc. even if you are “sfw”
^{(see above)}

• non-system littles (littlespace)
^{(see above)}

• anti/DID/anti-endogenic systems/anti-plural etc
^{(see: ableists. i also do not police or gatekeep a community i am not in. it is literally not my gate to keep or unkeep. see THDstatement if you're here about the DID thing.)}

• anti-“tulpas”
^{im a roleplayer. it harms noone. if this starts affecting your mental health then, of course, i advise seeking therapy. calling people who do this delusional? see: ableists.}

• anti kin
^{(see above + kinning does not mean gender. identifying with and enjoying a character doesn't mean you're delusional. if you're anti-kin and use such arguments, please refer to the ableist section; which is, to say, the bin.)}

• factkin / pro-factkin
^{(this is a parasocial delusion. please seek help asap. if you are aware of this and actively trying to change this, then you do not count as pro-factkin.)}

• RPF (real person fiction) shipper, writer or RPer.
^{(see above, but also stop making this content. there's a difference between just drawing people you like - being a fan - and being an absolute creep.)}

^{(does not apply if ok'd with whoever it's about before it's published, and is obviously an AU rather than trying to replicate IRL things or something).}

• over the top harry potter and jk rowling stans
^{(refer to everything above the stalkers section.)}
^{(i put this here twice because fuck jk rowling)}

rules for engagement or whatever might vary by site. this isn't to say we're gonna duel or anything (lol). my language can be a bit dramatic, but to try and explain better - a game site might vary from, say, a character storage site. general rule of thumb is just to leave me alone if you meet the above criteria.

ati
ask to interact
• satanists
(i was stalked for 4+ years by someone who claimed to be joy of satan. just wanna make sure you're chill.)

• anyone under the age of 16. (this is so i am appropriately interacting with you. you are safe with me, but i need to be careful with what i say. idk how to word this sorry.)

• JK Rowling fans, or anyone who likes any of the series she's involved in the creation, distrubution or marketing thereof. This includes the games.

• Same goes for DMSP stans at the moment.
^{People who just watch the videos and know he's done fucky stuff are OK but be aware of rest of DNI.}

^{This is more because I am wary of DMSP fans as a result}
^{of harassment and immaturity I see from the fandom.}
^{I have the same vibe towards Sonic, MLP and Homestuck fans.}

THD Statement

About

jeez i finally remembered how to get back into my account lmao

https://en.pronouns.page/@thegremlin0

call me sans or aly, I use they/them pronouns and I am an adult. the only reason I am not specifying my exact age is in case I forget or I'm unable to update this, but i am above the age of 21.

as of last updating (6th april 2022) i am 25. i'll be 26 on may 14th.

despite the above DNI/BYF and stuff like that im actually p chill, I just have... boundaries. i think we all do. I'm just more open about it than most. i'm also a bit prone to word vomit, so it's probably a lot longer than it could be. wouldn't be opposed to getting some help shortening some stuff tbh, but i'm not actually used to getting constructive feedback, so..

i'm not going to punch you or anything if you break my DNI/ATI, probably just silently block and move on. if you break it on purpose just to be unkind then... i suppose that reflects more on you than anything. kinda sad though.

i have been stalked in the past over a period of years, and I do not say this lightly, so I might suddenly become distant if you trip a red flag. sometimes this can be a false positive. think of norton anti-virus. i try not to ghost people. if I fail to respond its more likely that I either just forgot or went inactive on that site.

at some point i'll make this pretty! today is not that day though.

Contact

PM me on toyhouse for contact stuff.
i don't give this out willy nilly as a result of a stalker i had on dA, and because of the kiwifarmer wannabes on other sites.

THDramas Statement

its bullshit, plain and simple.

first, the claims are unproven and unsubstansiated. i didnt claim to have DID and i was checking the list because i had a username related to a canon character and foresaw the bullshit about to happen. when i saw more than half of the list was only added due to their usernames (some, including mine at the time, were based on popular and occasionally 'cringey' characters. none of these people were claiming to have it, bar a couple who i cannot speak for.)

the person who made the list also admitted several times they did it out of pettiness, and only did it to feel cool on a blog. this is what contrinuted to the original blog going down. i do not condone the old or new blogs, btw, the only reason i was aware of either of them was because, surprise, my stalker liked to abuse these mediums to spread straight up slander with no proof or evidence. like if i'd actually done something wrong, i get it, i'd apologise. there are things i've done wrong elsewhere i have apologised for and i regret - but i genuinely have nothing to apologise for here, because i didn't do anything wrong.

i don't even have to explain my DNI, but here goes - i don't have DID, so im not going to gatekeep a community i'm not in. boom. done. sorted. if anyone had bothered to ask instead of gossiping and making up shit, we wouldn't be here.

a community i am actually in is the autism community. im autistic. i was officially diagnosed twice thanks to NHS fuckery. i still support self-diagnosis and self-advocacy on this front, as whilst i was officially diagnosed the first time at 4, i technically grew up 'self diagnosed' because they didn't tell my SINGLE MOTHER, due to the fact she had her own mental issues going on. (i had two moms, but laws back then didn't count my other mom as my mom.)

i was diagnosed the second time, again officially, at aged 16. i was not provided support with my disabilities.

many people will not be diagnosed when they grow up because they simply fall through the net. maybe for financial reasons, maybe because they don't fit the stereotype neurotypicals push that mandates that all 6 year old white boys that like trains must be autistic.

autism is a spectrum. i do not have the place to police DID communities because i am simply not in it - i don't have DID.

next, kin does NOT mean DID. I do not have DID. (yes, i'm typing this until someone remembers to read.) i kinned sans for fun, not one of those 'ermagerd no doubles' people. i just relate to the character and i liked the aesthetic, that's it. it was a fun thing to do for stress relief. being called delusional for liking a character is ableist. fuck off.

this is different from roleplay, which i also enjoy doing as a side thing. effectively it was just a choice of a few profile pictures and aesthetics.

the reason why 'sans' is my name is... literally just that i'm 'sans' a name. i don't identify with a name right now, so i go by online names or by sans, or by the names of my RP characters. i'm sure i'll find one for myself eventually, but 'sans' started as a simple placeholder lol...

did i need to explain all of this? yeah, i kind of did, considering there's a website dedicated to making up shit for fun.

as someone who has actually had a history of mental issues and a genetic history of psychosis, it's offensive. i know full well the kinning stuff is just for fun and has no bearing on reality - and apparently, this is the difference between myself and the drama vultures of THD, who will believe anything thrown at them without thinking critically about any of it.

im not going to censor my language here. i think it's fucking ridiculous. learn to think for yourselves instead of believing wannabe #gossipgirls on the internet lmao???

i've never claimed to have DID. i don't have it. i have never claimed to actually have it. i had suspicions my brain was fucky, to put it lightly, but i have other stuff to deal with before the waiting list for the NHS finally lets me access therapy again. like, y'know, my mom who had literally died around the time i was being accused of all of this.

i remember explaining some of the shit going on to one of the mods at the time, but they chose to selectively post things to suit their 'side' of the story, rather than admit the whole story and the fact they're just making this up for entertainment and views.

but clearly you're only here to scavenge for more funny shit to make yourselves feel better about being losers w/ nothing better to do.

maybe you should close your blog like the last one did too, because clearly people are going to bitch 'privately' and make shit up either way, which makes a slander blog absolutely useless for anything other than bear-baiting for entertainment. (and if that entertains you, maybe you need to seek new hobbies... or therapy for the toxic behavior.)

go touch grass. you're terminally online. nice try projecting tho.